How to be a good submissive in bed

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How to be a good submissive in bed

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How To Be A Good Submissive In Bed Video

How to Be a Better Submissive [BDSM]

For some, the only type of submission that they ever want to experience is giving their man oral sex. The first stage to getting your partner to understand your submissive tendencies and the fact that you want to learn how to be more submissive is talking to him about it.

Coming right out and telling him everything about it may be a bit "too much, too soon. Starting with simple things is best, before graduating to telling him about the more extreme submissive tendencies you may have.

Just because you want to learn how to become more submissive for your partner does not mean that you need to become weak or feeble when you are around him.

In fact, he will probably respect you less if you do start acting weak and feeble around him. Being kinky is all about role-playing , that is, acting.

To make sure that your partner still totally respects you while you submit to him, it's important that you both establish some ground rules so that it never gets to a point where you no longer have control in your life and he has total control.

A major component of establishing some ground rules with your partner when you are being submissive is what's called a "safe word. Making sure that you both know the safe word and when to use it is crucial.

I like your blog.. Knowing our likes and dislikes is the most important thing. You can read more about it here.

Im struggleing to know exactly how to be the best sub. We have a 13 yr old daughter who is never away from us and time alone to cummacate is scarce.

Can you help me?? Struggling to be a good sub while dealing with teenage children can be frustrating. I am new to being a sub I have always had it in me but it just took the right man to bring it out of me.

Hi Peaches! Be sure to download the cheat sheet above, and you can also check out this article. I was in what I thought was a submissive role in my past but now I see was being abused.

I have since been talking with a Master and I am struggling with His written assignments. We have not met yet.

Master says I am giving text book answers and not from my own heart. He wants me in position humble and to describe my thoughts with questions He specifically asks.

Like how i feel spiritually, emotionally, sexually, physically and mentally about me being his slave. He made it clear that any punishment I would give to myself and He would decide what counted.

I am new to the lifestyle and finally found a real Dom. He is a Daddy and we are going by the book so to speak because of my inexperience.

I have found though I love the thought of submitting to him I have a brat side to me. Love to bring out the DD side of him. I am fearful I will be too much for him.

One of the things I struggle with is the way my Master makes me feel. I get lost in him, in my need to service him. When he is near, I am a puddle, and I sink into subspace at the sound of his voice.

I have difficulty with this for a number of reasons. It is not in my nature to give of myself so fully and I wonder if I am giving too much.

Hi Kim! Hi Crystal! For tips on obeying DDlg and long-distance relationship rules be sure to check out these articles:. Hi thanks you so much for the adivce I hope I can become a better sub and that it works thanks you.

Never having even read 50 Shades of anything or seen the movie or even having any thoughts on the subject, I have no idea where to start apart from maybe picking my chin off the floor.

I have been maneuvering your site and thank you for being here but I really do not know where to start still. Should I be saying Yep lets do this, am I insolent in wanting to ask lots of questions?

I am about to turn 50 so I have been committed over the last 12 months to staring my life from scratch and am trepidacious though completely open to the thought of this sort of relationship being a new way of living.

Ok I am now ranting apologies. But thanks for being in amongst the confusion. My X husband changed to be a submissive person.

He was always mistreating me when we were married. I have been with my Sir for around 18 months. Be sure to check out this article.

Without a partner. I am considering a relationship as a sub. The Dom has asked me to make sure I really want this. I like that, but it makes me emotional, thus harder to make a decision.

I have no experience with this, in fact have always had to be the one in control and have no idea of what all is expected of me. I really want love.

Is love a thing a Dom can have for the sub? I feel like I am on an emotional roller coaster not knowing which way is up or down. A Dom and sub can definitely love each other, Sunny.

And many BDSM relationships are centered around love. Thank you. I guess I am just afraid of getting into something where I will remain unloved.

Can you tell me generic things that most Doms want from their subs? He keeps saying he wants me to be sure I want it, but when I ask what the conditions are he seems to busy to explain.

No problem, Sunny! Be sure to download the free contract here for a general idea of what most Doms expect.

You can read more about that here. Stay safe! Use it to stop what ever is going on should be no recourse for doing so.

Be sure to read this article for help with communicating with your Dom. Not that I am but I am interested in your answer? Thanks so much the articles are great and so informative!

Hi Carra! Can a sub make a potential Dom work for it? Make him earn my submission? You could have requirements that have to be met first.

You can also check out this article for tips dealing with potential Doms. Have fun and be safe! You gave me a rather clear vision of what should be a good relationship i.

I am really glad I found this blog. There is a lot of information that I want to know. I am not a sub yet but I want to be.

Hi Terri! There are lots of single mothers who are subs. Just remember to stay safe and keep learning all you can about the lifestyle.

I have kind of fallen into a submissive role with my very long term partner. This has all happened so quickly and we are both enjoying this new phase of our sexual relationship,but it has come about because I kissed another guy.

Maybe I did this because I wanted to be punished. I actually have lots for Doms, Annette! You can check out this article to get you started.

Your email address will not be published. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. What is a sub?

A submissive can take on many different roles such as: Little Slave Property Secretary Pet Masochist They strive to please their Dom in all things, not just sexually.

Challenges to being submissive Subs are not perfect; they will mess up from time to time. Also a test to many is being obedient even when not in the presence of their Dom.

Ways they can do this are: Getting sufficient sleep Exercising regularly Eating a healthy diet Dressing properly Having good hygiene and grooming True submission is not just a role, it is a way of life.

Let me know in the comments. The truth is, in general, men are built naturally physically stronger than women. Deep down, all women have vulnerabilities and deep fears and feelings of uncertainty, especially in the face of violence.

Places you can never go by yourself. Every day there are men out there standing up for what is right. If you always assume bad intent in a man and let your feminine love be capped by your resentment , how can a man ever be a man around you?

Example 1: Being submissive is also about trusting your man enough to let him show you the way sometimes. Many women ask how not to be boring in their relationship.

And guess what, this is just one of the ways to not be boring. Surrender and allow your man the gift of your submissiveness!

Example 2: Also, you can ask him for help. Asking him for his opinion, or asking him for solutions is another method through which you can be submissive in a relationship.

Many men who are in touch with their masculinity at their core would jump at the chance to help a woman with something — really! It makes him feel needed, and useful.

So, ask him for help even with the smallest things like bringing the shopping in, opening a jar, carrying something heavy, undoing a knot, etc.

Give him trust where you know it is deserved, and do it without question. The masculine energy wants to be trusted.

If you doubt your man all the time, it feels hurtful. It drains from the relationship bank! Example 3: Know that he wants to have good direction to add to your life, so verbally thank him and appreciate him for gifting you with direction.

Is your man serious about committing to you? This is because each mistrust is possibly stripping him of hope, as well as stripping him of his trust in you and the relationship!

You just express your fear when you know he may well be wrong. You just have to behave as a woman who is willing to show that you are open to him even when he is wrong.

What you want to avoid, is fighting to be top dog in the relationship. This would crush his masculine soul. Instead, to add value to your relationship, would you prefer to suggest to him that it makes you feel scared and nervous because of list reasons?

As a woman who is learning to give a man the gift of being submissive, of course you would choose the second option.

Of course, if this is a man who is constantly making bad decisions, you may not want to stay with him long-term. However, the principle of learning to show up more submissive and open in your feminine energy is the same.

Choose to value openness MORE than cutting him down and emasculating him. Ultimately, inside of a healthy relationship, it should be more important to you to value openness, than it is to value cutting him down.

Because being open and surrendering adds to the passion, attraction and connection inside of a relationship. Whereas being domineering just takes value from the relationship and ruins the connection.

The same protective instinct applies with their wife or girlfriend, if only she could show a little innocence and submission — looking up to him as the leader.

Innocence can also erode with a very high number of sexual partners as well as with the number of toxic relationships you have been in. We are encouraged to do things that basically ruin our innocence from a young age.

A girl who is well loved and who feels pretty and beautiful. What does her energy feel like? Is she warm or cold? Is she hyperactive or calm?

Is she vengeful or vulnerable? Despite you having a possibly traumatic upbringing, CAN you find it within yourself to connect to an innocent and pure girl within you?

You see, no high value, masculine man wants to fail at leadership, especially with his woman. To be submissive, a woman has to be OK with being uncertain.

Just look to your man as a possible source of strength for you when you might need it. A lot of people think that by not trusting people, they are being strong, independent and smart.

We walk around, holding ourselves back, not able to be free and to let go, and to fully enjoy what life has to offer. We become unable to give people a chance to show their better side often if you trust someone, they want to please you MORE.

Read my article about what is a strong woman. The quality of your relationship with your man is in direct proportion to the level of uncertainty that you can handle.

By surrendering, you give your relationship the chance to be more real and just be free. Without so much pent up anger and negative association that plagues many modern marriages and relationships.

Men can come to resent a woman who is always fighting to be more significant than he is. By letting her guard down, a woman can start the process of letting him in: being open to him.

Also, being able to surrender shows that you have plenty of self confidence and esteem as a woman. This means you are not the kind of woman who just has to prove yourself and be in control all the time.

The root of our anxiety in a relationship with a man and the root of our conflict with men is not being able to understand them. What men perceive as high value is often very different to what we perceive value in as women.

If you want to learn how to add value to men, then check out Understanding Men.

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